This is because despite all the effort they exerted just to get their own child under their care, they will end up defeated by the very decisions and choices that they have made. Although losing a child custody case is equivalent to the feeling of losing the child, this should not be the end of everything. This is because you will have to deal with mix emotions concerning not only your times with the whole family but also have to address the difficulties that your child experiences or will experience through the process. But since it is inevitable to go through the process of child custody when a couple separates and file for divorce, you should stop dwelling on the past and look forward to a new life with your child. This could be difficult if the child is well-cared for or the custody plan had been in place for some time. Can anybody have custody over a child other than the parents? In California, judges must first consider the parents first, either singly or together. A judge, however, may give custody to another person (a grandmother, step-parent, or a friend) without the parents consent. Best Interests of the Child: The Key to Deciding Child Custody Cases In any child custody case, the court decision always focuses on the best interests of the child. This is a great consideration whether an out-of-court settlement has been reached by both parents and their lawyers or a custody decision is made by a family court. And when handled properly, people can get lifelong lessons from these trying times and use it to live a good and contented life. Making the best out of what you have Experts say that it is only common for people to feel depression, anxiety and defeat if life has been giving them so many tests and trials such as enduring a child custody case. This would involve the establishing of his paternity of the child and subsequently, petitioning the court for his share of parental rights. At best, the unmarried father can only gain some form of child custody and visitation rights. This is dependent, too, on the mother s cooperative attitude on agreeing out of court settlements.