Chapter 4: Improve Communications
Synopsis
Once you have been talking for a while and both of you feel comfortable around one another it is time to start working on improving your communication skills with each other. It is important that the issues that split your relationship in the first place be resolved. It is also very important that people in a relationship are able to verbalize their feeling and thoughts in an appropriate manner. Just as the information should be relayed in an appropriate manner it needs to be received that way as well. So if you plan on giving your relationship another try it is highly advised that you work on your communication skills.
The following chapter will provide you with some helpful hints that will be sure to help you improve your communication skills and give your second shot more of a chance.
Learn How to Communicate
Communication is extremely important in any relationship, whether it be personal or social. That is why you need to work on your communication skills if you want things to work out with you and your ex. If you can talk your issues out with you ex they will surely be impressed and will be much more likely to give your relationship another chance.
The following are five steps you need to follow to ensure you are communicating in an effective manner.
- Don’t Interrupt: It is important that you do not interrupt your ex when you are speaking with them. This can be very difficult to do at times, especially when emotions are involved or a problem is being discussed. You have to force yourself to stop speaking sometimes and to wait your turn. Your discussion will go nowhere if you are constantly interrupting your ex because neither one of you will ever make your point clear.
- Make Sure You Listen: Just because you are not interrupting your ex and you can hear what they are saying does not mean that you are actually listening. You need to clear your mind of thoughts of what you will say next and make sure you are retaining what your ex says to you.
- Be Honest And Have Open Discussions: It is important that you are always honest and that you are available to talk about anything. This will promote trust between you and your ex and make the chances of the two of you getting back together much greater. Lying to your ex and not being open to talk about certain things will surely make them feel like you have not changed and will make them feel as if giving it another try would be pointless. Always be honest!
- Control Your Nonverbal Communication: A lot of people are not aware of the fact that they communicate more with nonverbal communication than they do with actual spoken words. There are certain things you should avoid when speaking to your ex is you want to have a productive conversation. For example, you should not have your arms crossed because this will give off the impression that you are closed to the conversation. You need to make sure that you are making eye contact as well and you need to respect space and boundaries.
- Focus The Conversation On the Present: It is important that you do not let your conversations constantly shift back to past issues, especially those that have been resolved. If you do not let go of the past you will find yourself in an endless cycle that will get you nowhere and will surely not contribute to you getting back together with your ex. Some things are best just left alone and left in the past. Don’t bring up old emotions and feelings that will damage your efforts. Problems need to be sorted out but not dwelled on.
If you follow these steps you will surely have productive conversations with your ex and you will be able to begin the process of repairing your damaged relationship. It may be hard at times to follow these rules while communicating with your ex but you must keep in mind that one day all of your efforts will likely be rewarded by you winning back the heart of your ex.
- Chapter 1: Recover From a Broken Heart
- Chapter 2: Understand What Went Wrong
- Chapter 3: Getting in Touch Again
- Chapter 4: Improve Communications
- Chapter 5: The Happy Reunion
