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A "Plan 9" Book?
by: Ed Williams

Sometimes, when you do a little writing like I do, you get tipped off as to what upcoming books and authors are really gonna be hot. And folks, I’ve got a book title and an author’s name for y’all that I think may be the hottest of this entire year. The book’s title?

“Atlanta Nights.”

The author’s name?

Travis Tea.

This book is an absolute scream, the literary equivalent of “Plan 9 From Outer Space.” It was actually written by a very talented group of science fiction authors who put it together as a sting on a vanity, print-on-demand publisher out of Maryland called Publish America who tries to disguise themselves as a traditional publishing house. (Translated, they tell people they’re picky about what they will publish, but the reality appears to be that they will publish almost anything). This group of authors decided to put them to the test - they deliberately wrote a horrible book, submitted it, and guess what? This “publisher” offered them a publishing contract. I kid y’all not.

Want to get an idea of what to expect from “Atlanta Nights?” Here are some actual quotes from the book, courtesy of Mr. Travis Tea, author extraordinaire,

“All her life Margaret had worked hard, harder than anyone else. Her sisters, all of them far more beautiful than she, had coasted through life like a toboggan down the snow hill of life.”

"I remember one night, the best night for us. He took me to Rome where we stood in the light of the Eiffel Tower and watched the people go by.”

“The sun broke through the clouds then its brilliant golden disk burning a hole through the great puffs of water vapor to send a shaft of golden light zigzagging down through the layers of atmosphere and warm the earth in a way that no sunlight since the beginning of time had ever warmed the earth before.”

“Bruce Lucent put the tray down on the table. He began to shape the hamburger patties, shaping the meat into round, circular shapes with his strong hands. Usually he caressed the hamburger like a lover, loving the way the soft red meat squished yieldingly between his hands and the sensuous sucking sounds it made when he pulled his hands away once he got the round shapes just the way he wanted them, not too thick and not too thin, not too wide and not too small, but just right, like the Three Bears, except it was hamburger and not porridge.”

“Richard didn't have as sweet a personality as Andrew but then few men did but he was very well-built. He had the shoulders of a water buffalo and the waist of a ferret. He was reddened by his many sporting activities which he managed to keep up within addition to his busy job as a stock broker, and that reminded Irene of safari hunters and virile construction workers which contracted quite sexily to his suit-and-tie demeanor. Irene was considering coming onto him but he was older than Henry was when he died even though he hadn't died of natural causes but he was dead and Richard would die too someday.”

“Okay,” Nance began. Setting down the pencil before he stabbed himself with its point (he did this once, and it meant he couldn’t work for days) .It hurts like crazy! I went to the doctor’s and they had to dig the point out and everything. I think you can die of lead poisoning if they don’t get the point out], he clasped his muscular hands behind his back and commenced to pace around the small, windowless office. There was a vase of flowers on his desk, and the petals were slowly falling off them. “It’s about your father.”

Isn’t that just too rich? And here’s the best part - you can actually buy a paperback copy of “Atlanta Nights!” Folks, believe me when I tell y’all that a lot of people already are. Visit this web site:

www.lulu.com

Then go into their search engine, type in “Atlanta Nights,” and you’ll be able to see the book’s cover and read some reviews. The price of the book is very reasonable, and the proceeds from its sales will be going to a very worthwhile charity. “Atlanta Nights” is getting so hot that it’s rumored that Travis Tea will be going on a nationwide bookselling tour sponsored by a national oil change company soon, and there’s bound to be big demand for a sequel if this thing keeps going in the direction it is. Just remember that I told y’all about it first, and, other than that, I’ve got to go. I’ve got four emails from people wanting to know how to get their own copies of “Atlanta Nights,” and, as Mr. Tea’s personal publicity person, I’m obliged to go help them all out...

About The Author

Ed was born June 19, 1956, to Ed and Barbra Williams in Forsyth, Georgia. He was raised in Juliette and is a proud product of the Monroe County public school system. He graduated from Mary Persons High School in 1974, obtained an Associate’s degree from Gordon College in 1976, a BBA from Georgia College and State University in 1978, and an MBA in 1991 from the same university. He and his family currently reside in Macon, Georgia.

Ed’s life took a decided turn in 1995 when he bought a home computer and began writing down wild old stories about his upbringing in Juliette.These stories, through an unusual series of events, were published in 1998 in hardback under the title, “Sex, Dead Dogs, and Me: The Juliette Journals.”

Ed’s book started out in four bookstores in Macon, Georgia - through word of mouth and the internet eight months later he was being stocked nationally in the Books A Million chain, and other large bookstore chains were also considering stocking him. Ed's second book has recently been released, entitled “Rough As A Cob: More of The Juliette Journals.” It is published by River City Publishing.

Recently, Ed has appeared on the Georgia Public Radio program, “Cover to Cover”, he writes a syndicated weekly newspaper column called "Free Wheelin'," and has won two prestigious online reader’s poll awards for his book. He is in demand as a speaker, and is already being compared to some of Georgia’s most noted humorists.

ed3@ed-williams.com

This article was posted on February 08, 2005

 



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Steps to Publishing Success
 by: Zaak O'Conan

Even if your best friend owns a top publishing company, giving you an immediate "in," this does not guarantee publishing success.

First, you have to write a quality book that has a clear target audience. And your book must answer a common problem or need that audience shares. Then you have to develop a marketing plan, and stick to it for at least two years.

Let's begin with the process that should commence before you write your first word. Begin by reading A LOT. Read both books you passionately love and books you can't seem to make it past page five. Then figure out what the author did in the book you loved, and what was wrong with in the book you couldn't finish. Write down these points so they are crystal clear to you. Read other people's books for inspiration and to discover what you should avoid as a writer.

The next step is to plan out your book. Narrow down your subject, and then divide it into chapters. Each chapter should address a specific aspect of the problem your book is going to solve. In each chapter, break the specific aspect down into several parts. This will help your readers take in your information a bit at a time instead of overwhelming them with every bit of information clogging up the pages until they feel like they're about to go blind. It's not quite spoon-feeding the information to your readers, but it's close.

The next two steps are obvious. Write your book and then revise it. And then revise it again. And perhaps again. Of course, writing is extremely hard, and writing a book can seem like an impossible task. There are many books out there that give you guidelines to help you become familiar - and even love - the process of writing and revision. Find a number of books about writing. Better yet, find a number of books about writing the specific type of book you aspire to write. These can serve as roadmaps on your writing journey.

Once you've written your ebook and revised it at least twice, show it to someone else whose opinion you respect. If you're lucky enough to know a good editor, see if you have something to barter for him or her to go through your manuscript. Or join a writing group and let the other members critique your work.

Then take all these ideas from other people, and revise your manuscript one last time. And then stop! Put down that pen! Get your hands off the keyboard!

One of the most important steps to actually producing a book is to know when to stop writing and tinkering with it.

You've finally written your ebook! Pop open the bubbly! Give yourself a night out on the town!

Okay, now that this necessary celebration is out of your system, what do you do next?

How to turn your ebook into Profits

Ebooks are a revolutionary way to publish your book without incurring the costs of print production. All you need is a relevant and targeted subject and some inexpensive software, and you can transform your manuscript into a book.

The problem, in terms of actually seeing any profits from your ebook, is that the market is overwhelmed with ebooks, and many of them are not worth the time it takes to download them. Just because the ability exists to easily produce an ebook, doesn't make it good writing.

Make sure your book does not simply rehash old material. You will injure your credibility as an author by claiming to offer valuable new insights and disappointing your audience with material they've read a zillion times before. So spend enough time writing and revising your book to make sure it's of the highest quality and presents the most current information. A good book will eventually sell itself; false claims about your book will make it extremely difficult to sell any future books you may write.

Assuming you have determined that you do indeed have a quality product that answers some question or need of your target audience with NEW information, how do you know how much to charge for it? Rule number 1: Set a price for your book equal to its value. An under-priced book will only give the impression that your book isn't worth very much.

To figure out a fair price, estimate how much time you put into creating it and how difficult it was to transform the necessary information into understandable and engaging writing. Figure out how much your time and effort is worth, and then price it accordingly. The goal is for you to be adequately compensated for your talent, your time, and your effort.

Once you've figured out a price that is high enough to convey the value of the book, but not so high as to be out of the reach of your target audience's mean budget, then it's time to offer it for sale on your website. To attract sales, you will need to develop a promotional campaign, particularly if you are an unknown author.

There are multitudes of books about self-promotion that will guide you in your efforts. Choose a plan that is both creative and professional. Learn how to write a catchy yet informative press release, and send copies of your ebook to sites that specialize in ebook reviews.

Learn how to write powerful sales copy, or hire someone to write it for you. This is an essential. You absolutely need excellent sales copy to sell your book. Make sure the copy includes all the reasons your target audience needs your book, and the benefits they will derive from buying it.

Use graphics in your promotional materials. Beautiful graphics have the power to instantly convey the quality and value of your ebook. Graphics can also convey the amount of valuable information the book contains, and your careful attention to detail. Professional graphics sell professional books. They reassure the customer that the product is what it claims to be.

Consider excerpting chapters for articles. You can offer these tidbits for free on your website as a sort of demo of your book. Include an order form for your ebook at the end of the excerpted articles.

Finally, when you set-up your download link, make sure to simplify the process. It's a good idea to offer a few bonuses that make your book even more enticing to purchase, but make sure the bonuses are valuable and high quality. Too many bonuses that are basically a load of useless stuff will compromise the impression your audience has of your ebook. The goal is to convey to your audience that they are getting a quality product for a good deal. That means applying restraint, especially when it comes to adding bonus items. Too much free stuff offered diminishes your credibility.

Make sure your book is a quality product. Make sure it is relevant and current. Develop an effective marketing plan that includes excellent sales copy and excerpted articles. Then offer your book for sale, and wait for your audience to discover you!



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