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Loving Our bodies "As Is": Three Fun, funny, No-Fail Techniques
by: Vicki Hannah Lein
Loving Your Body “As Is”
Three Fun, Funny, No-Fail Techniques
by Vicki Hannah Lein, M.S. Counseling © 2005

Life coach, singer/songwriter, and humorist Vicki Hannah Lein offers original, no-fail techniques to help you start loving your body – as it is. Right now.

I’m Talking to You!

I heard you groan when you read the title. I know what you are thinking: “Not me. Not ever! I am too disgusting, too fat, too ugly, too unacceptable, too rejected, too skinny, too pock-marked, too flat-chested . . .” I have heard it all and said much of it to myself.

Aren’t you tired of wishing you looked different? Aren't you sick of trying every new diet that steamrolls down the freeway aimed straight at your self-confidence? Do you think possibly you’ve been duped by a youth-obsessed, anorexia-inducing culture? ? Isn’t enough finally enough, already?

A confession: I do not yet love my body completely as it is. I am in recovery from a disapproval addiction, and I will need to be in recovery every day for the rest of my life – and so will you. This is not bad news; it is good news. Recovery is fun. You will live longer, laugh more, and have time to appreciate the important parts of your life instead of wasting your precious time focusing on that dry skin on your elbows or those little wrinkles around your eyes.

Technique # 1: Use Your Hateful Thoughts As Reminders to Love Yourself

Self-hate is a wily beast, and he takes on disguises, telling us his advice is “for our own good.” He is relentless and persistent. So use him! When he appears, use his energy as a reminder to do something lovely and generous for yourself, such as kissing your sweet lips on the bathroom mirror. You’ll dirty up the mirror, you say? Good! Those kiss marks will remind you to not take yourself so seriously, which is half of the battle.

Every time you have a mean thought about yourself, grab it by the throat, give it a quick kiss, and send it on its way. “Bye, bye, now!” You say as the hate and judgment scuttle out of your mind. “You go out and play in the middle of the freeway now. Don’t look both ways!”

This technique will work immediately. Make yourself laugh and you have almost won the battle. Your laughter has improved your digestion, reduced your stress, increased the effectiveness of your immune system, and brightened your day. What’s not to like?

Technique #2: Get Out of the Beauty Race

Every person decides what is beautiful and what is ugly. Some photographers, for example, think worms are gorgeous and so they are. We can decide we are beautiful “as is” if we stop comparing ourselves with others.

If you practice finding yourself inadequate, you get good at it. But you can become an expert who replaces comparing with appreciating the beauty around you – all beauty. Stop comparing yourself to other people right now. Go cold turkey.

Instead of judging yourself or others, enjoy the feel of your skin, the gentleness of a touch, the sweetness of a smile, and the glory of a generous nature. Take pleasure in the beauty of the sun shining in your friend’s golden hair. Just don’t compare your own “dishwater, mousy” hair with hers.

If you start to compare your aging hand to a younger woman’s, kiss your own hand and say, “I love you, my sweet.” It’s easy to love this hand that works for you all day long – typing, picking up coffee cups, and stroking the cheeks of those you love. Don’t tell your hand it is ugly because it’s showing the unique history of your journey on the planet. Do you really want the hands of a twelve year old forever? When you pay attention to what really matters, every invitation to compare yourself with others will turn into a moment of celebration.

Keep a journal. Write in it every day and celebrate yourself and other people. If you are not good at this to start with, don’t worry. You will get better.

Technique #3: Look at Yourself Naked in the Mirror and Celebrate Your Body “As Is.”

You can see why I saved this technique for the last. You might have to “cheat” when you try this habit at first, at least it may feel like cheating to you. That’s okay. Is your lip worthy of love? Your temple? How about the inside of your arm? Your ears? The area between your thumb and your index finger? Your fingernail? Find some part of your body you find acceptable as it is.

Focus on one body part until you love it. Then find another part to love just as it is. You might say: “I love you, Thumbnail. You are great. You protect me and I would be in a world of hurt without you. I have taken you for granted until now, but I am through with that!”

You Can Do It!

If three techniques feel like too many, pick the one that sounds the most fun and start practicing it every day. You deserve to be loved just as you are! Be the first one on your block to love your body “as is” and see the startling benefits. On second thought, who cares what the rest of the block is doing? Love now. You won’t regret it.


About the author:
Vicki Hannah Lein is an award-winning counselor, singer/songwriter, international speaker, author, trainer, and life coach. For a free sample of her song “I Deserve to Be Loved” and the introduction to her new book Woman with a Voice: Daring to Live Authentically Ever After, visit her web site: www.stepintoyourgreatness.us



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 10 Great Hair Care Tips
 by: Darla Di Grandi-Aguilera

If you watch the tabloids, you know that even the stars have bad hair days. It just seems that when the professional stylists are out of the picture, it is inherently human to have a less than glamorous mane. But you can do your part to stay ahead of the battle by following these great tips for hair care.

1. Use a professional conditioner that is formulated for your specific hair type. While you can skimp a little on the shampoo, a good, professional conditioner is a must have. Look for products in salons that are customized for your hair type. For instance: If you have color or a perm, choose a conditioner that is for chemically processed hair. And stay away from those all-in-one shampoo and conditioner combos.

2. Choose a cut tailored to your face and body shape. The number one mistake that people make when choosing a new hairstyle is to pick a style based on popularity rather than how it will enhance their features. Always choose a new cut based on how it will enhance or detract from your facial features and build. If you have broad shoulders, choose a full-bodied cut over a close cropped head hugging doo.

3. Don’t forget your UV protectants. Just as your skin gets damaged by wind and sun, so does your hair. To combat this, look for finishing products such as mousses, gels and sprays that block UV rays.

4. Keep your appointments. Did you know that your hair will split faster than it will grow? You need to get a trim every 6 to 8 weeks, even if it’s just a micro trim. A good hairdresser makes them good because they know what to leave on the head, not take off.

5. Leave chemicals to the professionals. There is a reason why beauticians need to go to school to learn how to handle chemicals and hair processes. You can do irreparable damage with these products even if the package says that it’s way easy. And even if you don’t make your hair fall out, you could end up looking like a clown and paying a stylist big bucks to fix your mess. (Note: Most stylists charge double the rate for corrective color than they do for normal color processes)

6. Get color for interest and body. Every cut needs a little bit of color to make it truly breathtaking. No matter whether your taste is subtle or dramatic, you can add interest and volume to your tresses with a color process. Highlights, lowlights, all over color, gray coverage, you name it, it’s all good for your look.

7. Do weekly conditioning treatments. Even if your hair is extremely healthy, it is constantly on the attack from wind, sun, cold and heat. During the summer months, your hair is battered even more when it absorbs chlorine and other chemicals from your pool.

8. Get an ionic ceramic flat iron. Instead of frying your hair with a conventional metal plated flat iron. Straighten your tresses, add shine and infuse moisture with one of the a negative ionic flat irons. We personally use T3 irons for all our work.

9. Choose your styling products wisely. Avoid products that leave build-up on your hair. If you see white gunk, that means that your product is not water-soluble and may be coating your hair shaft. Build-up causes limpness, breakage and inability to curl not to mention the white flakes.

10. Did you know that if you use a towel after your shower to dry your hair you are causing split ends and adding static electricity to your hair. Don’t rub the towel back and forth over your hair, scrunch the towel around your hair like your would scrunch crackers in your soup.

While all of these tips won’t make you look like you’ve hired a personal hairdresser, they will help you look the very best that you can each and every day. When it comes to hair care, remember that you wear your hair everyday. Now isn’t it worth the time, effort and money that it takes to keep it looking spectacular?


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